Generosity

That day I was on my way back to home. It was around 1-1.30 pm. I was standing in the door of the train...as usual .Its my favorite place...I really enjoy traveling by local train. It’s so much fun. There are so many different genres you come across….so many people of different backgrounds… different mentality….different behavioral patterns….real life!

So I was trying to eat up few remaining pages of Sudha Murty's book as I wanted to start the new one as early as possible. I was trying to relate myself to those stories in some way...of course in a positive way. If its about intellect then I thought "humm..am not dumb"..if its about love then I thought "I hardly hate anybody"...if its about kindness then I thought "hummm i am generous"....but I got a shock of my lifetime in few moments when I was engrossed in self appraisal. I was having a glance through the book at each station. I noticed a small kid is sitting in the door just opposite to me. He was not begging...not doing anything. just sitting there...still...with bare minimum clothes on his body, dark colored, tired eyes, as if he was not feeling well...i saw him and again buried myself in the book. Suddenly a lady in nauwari sari with a basket of vegetable rushed towards the door. She was a middle aged woman who was earning wages after quiet a hardship of a day. It was apparent that she wanted to get down and train whistled...in that rush moment she fumbled in her purse and took out two coins of Rs.2 and said"Ae pora, he ghe"( take this child). He was not in his senses...looked at her and accepted it with apathy...and she got down. I witnessed the whole incident …that lady disappeared...I was back to the book. I didn't understand what I was reading. I was just running through pages. I was feeling ashamed of myself....I was feeling very small...no one else showed the gesture that poor lady did...it moved me completely!

I was going through a thought process. Generosity...it’s the urge to help others no matter in what state you are in...If you the richest man of the world and doing charity....that's not a big deal. For me that lady was the epitome of kindness! I am quiet sure those Rs.4 were very precious to her...and she didn't even have a grudge against her act...she looked so contented. And how can we call our self generous?.....I didn't even feel like giving money to that guy as it would have looked like copying that lady...poor me....when I was about to get down I was on the edge of the door …searched for a note in the pocket and gave it to him....that boy looked at the note and then to me ...but I was not there....but it didn't give me any satisfaction....i was feeling still SMALL....

Hey thanks for thoughtful reply….
I do understand what you mean to say..I do understand the situation you were in..coz I have too experienced it...but now am also out of it...and my post was all about the new thought I have read…an entirely different concept …that was far away from my old school of thoughts..but then I wanted to read it…just to satisfy my own self!
I do believe in that supreme power…that ultimate source of energy...being a Reiki person I have experienced it too...I was at peace in my own shell…everything was as per my assumptions…the arguments I used to defend with were all one sided…means I never knew the other side and I was defending my side.. You don’t have to be biased about that truth…it’s simply truth...but I found myself favoring my own thought... that’s not fair right?
Before entering into this diversification I had already presumed that it would definately shatter me...confuse me..would put me in dilemma… again my foundation would strive for a base….but I wanted to do that!
And I read Buddha...I tried my level best to understand it..to absorb it... Its very difficult...i mean when you already have a full glass of water then to adjust some more water into it is next to impossible….but I guess I did it..with some pain..I was again disturbed…confused...I analyzed his theories...compared them with mine ..but finally I realized-He himself was talking about that ultimate source of energy with different perspective..the difference was he never openly addressed people towards it..He wanted people to understand life first...respect it...live it with good deeds..fulfill its purpose...then go ahead...but as I said earlier that context was far different then and thats why he taught the path of life from a different aspect! He never explained what was the enlightenment he had? But then what was it? It’s still a mystery…
So I hope you understand what I wanted to say..so...for me..truth is only one!

hi all...i know its been quiet a long time...i just disappeared..but hey watch there i'm back... rocking..as always...so whats up there in your lives?
ummmm...me...become more n more philosophycal these days ...
i have read a very nice book...just few days back...its about Budhdha...by osho!
So lots of things i have realised as if i never knew them...i has always heard about Budhdha that its pessimistic...or towards negativity....it doesnt talk about bright light at the end of the tunnel...no miracles....and ofcourse it is like that!
But then...now there are two truths ...one says..there is light....other says there is complete darknesss..whom should we believe in?But truths cant be two..right?It has to be the same ALWAYS..thats why its the truth...

What i could recollect from the book and my own experience is Truth is One!
But then how come its repelling? Its just matter of context in which Budhdha preached....it was the era when castism..religionism...racism was flourishing at its best..and just in the hope of that light at the end of the tunnel people were forced to behave as been ordered by cast gurus...no literacy...no education...people were deeply superstitious...there was no way to make them understand the actual meaning of Truth. The only path Budhdha chose to make them realise the importance of Existance of their own....meaning of Suchness in life...accept the life's ectacy and grief as well....just be happy...there is no way to pursuade people from concept of ..god, heaven-hell, reincarnation....so if death is the truth why to starve for life after death? if there is complete darkness at the end of the tunnel...then why not live the moment?....
But then as i said Truth can be only one! Light is there...then what did he mean?...Osho put it in this way..if half glass is filled with water you can either say its half full or half empty.
So if there are thousands of sun at the end of the tunnel then are we capable of perceiving it? nope... then that would be the complete darkness our eye would experience....but if we empower ourselves we are capable of perceiving that bright light..
So just enjoy your life....have faith in yourself...care for your existance...and be in the momment....thats what i could read from between the lines...N'JOY